Starring: Sunny Deol, Neha Dhupia, Amisha PatelDirector: Harry Baweja
This week’s new desi release is "Teesri Aakh: The Hidden Camera". It's a film which tries very hard to disguise itself as a serious story dealing with some very important issues that plague our society today. In the film, Sunny Deol plays a super cop who's trying to uncover a pornography racket.
His fiancee Neha Dhupia takes off to London to participate in some beauty pageant but ends up caught in a net of pornography and crime. She's bumped off by the bad guys and the only witness to her murder is Amisha Patel playing a dumb assistant director - and here I mean dumb as in she cannot speak. Sunny, who doesn't know until quite late in the story that his lady love has been knocked off, is determined to bring to task every scum bag who traps unsuspecting girls by planting hidden cameras in their bedrooms, bathrooms and changing rooms.
Now the most basic and intrinsic problem with this film is that it's made from such a rotten script that even Martin Scorcese couldn't make this film half way entertaining. You could easily trust a class four student to write a better essay than this script. Let me point out some examples of extreme stupidity in this story: A sleazy team of porn filmmakers secretly film Neha Dhupia while she's changing in her make-up room.
Instead of going to the police, or calling her fiance who's a supercop himself, she lets them blackmail her into acting in a porno film. Okay, now chew on this: Amisha Patel while on the run from villains stumbles into a nightclub where Jazzy B is performing a Punjabi song. Next thing you know, Jazzy B's in a trance and she's dancing with him, singing and all. Continuity is obviously no concern for the filmmakers who may set the story in London, but they film on Mumbai streets with Mumbai landmarks clearly visible all over.
And believe me, this isn't even the tip of the iceberg. The film is filled with so many such ridiculous and brainless scenes that you've tuned off barely fifteen minutes into the film.
There's a big, long monologue somewhere towards the end where Sunny Deol says it's not just pornographers who exploit women. He says everyone in society is guilty of that crime. He says people in offices do it, seemingly respectful people do it, even the media does it. What's very ironical is that Mr Harry Baweja, the director of this film is guilty of exactly the same crime. In this film itself, he inserts at least two inconsequential item songs with girls in little or no clothes. Double standards Mr Baweja, don't you think?
Now I understand that unlike other professions, there's no qualification or degree required to become an actor. They say acting talent is something you either have, or you don't.
It's not something you can acquire. When I see a film like "Teesri Aankh" I pray and I hope that somebody has the good sense to make it compulsory for every actor have at least some basic training before he or she is allowed to work on screen. Watching Aarti Chabria and Ashish Chaudhary in this film -- yes, they are in it too -- is as painful as pulling out your nostril hair.
And if you thought that giving Amisha Patel no dialogues meant that you won't have to endure her hysterical screaming and shouting, then think again, because Amisha seems to have discovered a whole new way to annoy you even without saying anything.
She gets all animated and breathes heavily and does just about everything she can to get you really mad. Of course it's left to Sunny Deol to save the day, and although he does have a few moments of sheer brilliance, he can't quite save this film from sinking like a rock.
You know, films like "Teesri Aankh" are the price we have to pay so that we can get a film like "Rang De Basanti" every now and then. It's like a punishment, it's like a peace offering.
And the reason "Teesri Aankh" is so damn annoying is because it's not only carelessly written and badly made, but it's also so offensive. It pretends to tackle serious issues but it's such a sell-out of a film. Bad films release at the cinemas every other week, but this one isn't bad, it's really terrible. It's terrible because it tries to make an ass out of you, and that's not fair.
Rating: (Such Trash!) 0/5
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