How to Annoy Your Girlfriend Through Text

Reply with “K.”

This response will make it sound like you’re blowing her off. No one likes to get a “K” message, especially not from their S.O. If she just told you something funny or wrote out a big message, hit her with a “K” to leave her feeling irritated. “Ok” and “Okay” work too!

Respond with one word.

Make her think that you’re totally uninterested in your convo. If your girlfriend just wrote out multiple texts or a huge paragraph, read the entire thing, then respond with “haha” or “nice.” You could also try “lol” or “cool.”

Leave her on read.

Not responding is one of the most annoying things you could do. If you two are having a lively texting conversation, stop in the middle of it and just don’t reply. She’ll probably be annoyed and wonder why you stopped texting her or what you’re doing.

Respond with pictures.

Spamming her with pics instead of texts is sure to make her annoyed. When she texts you, pick a funny photo out of your library and send that instead. If she questions it or asks why you sent that, pick another silly photo to send. Keep it up until she’s raging mad! You could also use funny gifs or short videos if you have them on hand. Or, try sending her a gif of the iMessage typing bubble. It will look like you’re crafting a long message, when in reality, you aren’t texting her back at all.

Make up a new word.

Act like it’s a totally normal word to use in everyday sentences. Come up with something funny, like “glorb” or “grunkle.” Then, throw it into conversation and act totally normal when she texts back confused. Try something like: “Hey, have you seen my glorb anywhere?” “Would you mind bringing my grunkle when you come over later?”

Text each letter individually.

Send her a string of messages spelling out what you want to say. This will fill up her phone with texts, and it will probably make her pretty mad! Your text will look something like: H E Y.

Make everything a hashtag.

Throw in some random hashtags that don’t really make sense. Hashtags make every sentence a little more exciting. Pick a random word in your text that you’d like to hashtag, then use it like it’s completely normal. “Hey, how’s it #going? I’m eating a #sandwich.” “Wanna watch a #movie later?” “I gotta go, I’m falling #asleep.”

Sprinkle in random emojis.

Pick emojis that don’t match the tone of your conversation. If she’s telling you something mundane, like how her day is going, throw in a laughing emoji or the poop emoji. She’s sure to be confused, and she’ll probably be even more irritated if you decide not to explain what you’re doing. Try out other random emojis, like ????, ✨, ????, ????️, ????.

Send her some dad jokes.

Annoying jokes like these are sure to make her groan. Fire up your dad brain and think of the most ridiculous, unfunny jokes you can. Then, send them to her, and don’t stop sending them (even if she begs you not to). “What did the ocean say to the beach?" "Nothing, it just waved." “I’m afraid of my calendar. It says my days are numbered.” “I made a pencil with two erasers. It was pointless."

Correct her grammar.

It’s super annoying to get corrected by your partner. If she messes up a word or picks the wrong “your,” be sure to point it out instead of responding to her message. She’ll be so irritated, she won’t know what to do! “Actually, it’s you’re.” “*Their.”

Forward her a chain message.

Those annoying chain messages are very irritating to receive. Find a chain message that tells you to forward it to 10 friends, then send it to your girlfriend. Bonus points if you do it right in the middle of your conversation! Try a message like: “It’s monday ✌️the start↗️of a new✅ week mondays✏️are✏️HARD ‼️send this↗️▶️▶️to 6 HOMIES to make them have a GOOD Monday. DON’T BREAK THE CHAIN or else you’ll have a BAD monday.⏩⏩⏩GO⏪⏪⏪”

Abbreviate everything you say.

Make up new abbreviations so she won’t know what they mean. Instead of “How are you?” try, “HAY?” When she inevitably asks what you mean, explain it to her like she should know what you’re talking about. Try out other weird abbreviations, like: “WU?” (What’s up?) “WHOL?” (Wanna hang out later?) “LGL.” (Let’s get lunch.)

Send a ton of texts at once.

The constant buzzing of her phone is sure to be super irritating. If she hasn’t texted you back in a while or you know she’s busy, send her 10 or 15 texts in a row begging her to text you back. When she finally does, she’ll probably be very annoyed. You could send messages like, “Babe?” “Baby?” “Why aren’t you replying?” “Are you busy?”

Sign her up for cat facts.

Randomly text her facts about cats to make her super confused. Pretend like you’re a bot who has been assigned to text her cat facts, then don’t stop, even when she asks you to. She’ll likely be pretty frustrated by the end of it, especially if you keep it up for a few hours. Text her things like: “You’ve been signed up for cat facts! Did you know that all cats have 2 eyes and 4 legs? Press STOP to stop receiving cat facts.” “Thanks for signing up for cat facts! There are over 100 breeds of domestic cats in the world. Reply with STOP to opt out.”