Holding Hands
The simplest cuddling move for couples on the go. It’s one of the first cuddles you’re likely to experience with a new partner: that quiet thrill when they grab your hand as you’re walking down the street or watching a movie together. But it’s also the mark of an established couple very much in love. Benefits: Hand holding is an easy breezy way to express affection while still doing your own thing, but it can also alleviate stress and lower your blood pressure. What it means: Holding hands is a casual way for a new relationship to take things up a notch. Grabbing your partner’s hand tells them you want to be intimate, but it still allows for almost complete freedom of movement.
Arm Around Their Shoulder
Wrap your partner in a cozy side hug. The yawn-stretch-arm-around-the-shoulder is the classic iteration of this cuddling move, but you don’t have to be so coy about it. Draping an arm around your partner’s shoulders is a simple way to be close to them while cozied up on the sofa bingeing Netflix or sitting in bed on a Sunday morning with coffee and the crossword. Benefits: This position is a super low-key and comfortable one to initiate and sustain (although, yes, the hugger’s arm might fall asleep). It’s an easy way to express affection while still being chill. This position is ideal for situations where you both want to face the same direction, like when you're at the movies or at a sports game together. What it means: If your partner wraps their arm around you, take it as a sign they’re feeling cozy and affectionate toward you. If you've recently begun dating, it's a way to express care without coming on too strong, but even if you've been together a while, a half-hug is a chill, casual way to tell your partner you're comfy and relaxed with them.
Spooning
“Big spoon” and “little spoon” don’t have to be permanent roles. Spooning is perhaps the most classic way to lie next to one another in bed or on the couch—with one of your bodies scooped around the other person’s body (y’know, like a spoon). While some couples are solidly fixed in their big spoon-little spoon roles, lots of couples like to switch it up now and then. Benefits: A spoon a day keeps the conflict away…. Not only is spooning a great way to build intimacy, it can also generate a more peaceful relationship: cuddling has been shown to decrease conflict between romantic partners. What it means: You and your partner are at one with each another. Though you’re not facing one another, the mirror-image effect spooning creates suggests you see eye-to-eye on most things.
Half-Spoon
Like the full-spoon, but more intimate. As classic as the full-spoon is, with the little spoon facing away from the big spoon, the position doesn’t always allow for as much intimacy as you and your partner might want. The half-spoon presents a solution to that problem: instead of you both lying on your sides, your partner lies on their back and you lie on your side (or vice versa) with one arm draped over your partner’s chest and your head resting on their chest or shoulder. Benefits: Lying on your partner’s chest, you’ll be able to hear their heartbeat, which is a crazy-intimate thing—but it’s also soothing, as it hearkens back to when you were a baby, falling asleep on your mother’s chest to the rhythm of her own heart. What it means: Opening your chest to your partner sends a message that you trust them and you’re all-in on the relationship. Meanwhile, to huddle against your partner’s chest suggests you rely on them to protect you. Studies also show that over time, the heart rates of partners who are very in sync with one another tend to align. So inviting your partner to listen to your heartbeat may be an indication that you want to take your relationship deeper.
Face to Face
This position lets you gaze lovingly into each other’s eyes. Whether you’re lying on your backs, stomachs, or sides, lie close and face one another. This position allows for some independence—you can lie on your back and your partner can lie on their stomach, for instance—without sacrificing the intimacy of eye contact. Benefits: Eye contact promotes feelings of confidence and calm and works to cultivate intimacy. It can also boost mutual attraction. What it means: Gazing into your partner’s eyes shows you’re invested in them and attracted to them. Maintaining eye contact indicates you want to get to know someone and that you’re not shying away from making a deeper connection.
Legs Entwined
Your legs hug so your arms don’t have to. If you and your partner prefer different sleeping positions or feel claustrophobic while cuddling, leg hugging is the position for you. Simply lie in bed (or sit on opposite ends of a long sofa) and entwine your legs while keeping your upper halves separate. Leg hugging allows you to lie or sit apart from one another, but still make physical contact. Benefits: This position allows for intimacy (including the potential for footsie, which is fun) without sacrificing freedom of movement in your upper half. You can read, scroll through your phone, or eat while your legs are entwined with your partner's. What it means: It shows that you and your partner value your own spaces, but still desire connection, and you’ll make it happen.
Embrace
The face-to-face embrace is one of the most intimate cuddling positions. Hugging while lying in bed or snuggled on the couch, eyes locked on one another, is the ideal position for couples who don’t want to miss a single thing. Couples might do this more in the honeymoon phase, when everything is exciting and new, but established couples may also do this if they’re super into each other and want to be as close as physically possible. Benefits: Not only does hugging release oxytocin, the “love” hormone responsible for creating connections, but it can also elevate your mood and even prevent you from getting sick. What it means: Eye contact is already an indicator you and your partner desire and trust one another. Pair that with a vertical embrace, and you and your partner are on your way to a deep, intimate soul-bond.
Back to Back
A great way to cuddle without getting too…sweaty. Let’s face it, during those dog days of summer, spooning can get a little unbearable. Lying in bed with your backs pressed against one another is a position that affords you the ability to stay physically connected, while still letting you both breathe. Benefits: This is the perfect cuddle for couples who want to maintain physical contact, but also want a little more freedom than some more claustrophobic positions allow for. Plus, it’s a great position for people who get hot easily. What it means: You and your partner respect one another. You’re aware of each other’s need for personal space and independence and neither of you expect the other to sacrifice their comfort for a close cuddle—but at the same time, you’re connected and supportive of one another.
Head in Their Lap
Resting your head in your partner’s lap promotes trust and comfort. Whether your partner is sitting up or lying down themselves, lie down and place your head on their lap for some comfort and relaxation (with a hint of eroticism). This position probably isn’t one you want to sleep through, but it’s great for watching TV, listening to music, or talking about your day. Benefits: The person whose lap is being used is in the perfect position to stroke their partner’s hair or give them a head massage, increasing the soothing, sleepy feelings. What it means: In this position, the partner whose lap is being used becomes a trusted protector or guardian of the partner lying in their lap. This is a nice position for couples to adopt when one of them has had a rough day and needs some soothing.
The Butt Pillow
Use your partner's rear end as a headrest. If your partner is lying prone in bed (i.e., on their stomach), lay your head on their butt for your own personal pillow, or roll over onto your own tummy so they can use your rear as a headrest. It's a great way to chill out with your partner and gab, read, or watch TV, though it's probably not an ideal sleeping position. Benefits: Lying in this position is a great setup for you and your partner to chill out together on a lazy day. And, because of the body parts involved, it's an easy segue into sexier territory, but it doesn't have to be! What it means: This position screams "casual yet intimate." The butt pillow is a position reserved for couples who are so intimate, they'll use each other's butts as pillows, and so casual, they'll use each other's butts as pillows. Sexy, yet utterly un-self-conscious.
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