Be Your Best Self
Before you attract a man, you need to develop self-confidence. If you're not happy with who you are, it'll show from a mile away. Men are most attracted to women who look like they're having fun with who they are, not those who are desperately seeking someone to fill a void in their lives. Here are some tips for improving your self-confidence: Tell yourself what an awesome person you are! Remind yourself of your best attributes and skills, and be proud of what makes you unique. Keep a journal where you can highlight some of your strengths as a person to make you feel that you are worthy of a man's attention. Always keep a positive attitude! Set your mind to it! Remember that you're beautiful on the inside--and the outside. Though we are all far from perfect, before you spend an evening out, it's important to look in the mirror and remember your best attributes, whether it's your rocking smile, your perfect teeth, or your mile-long legs. If you focus on the positive aspects of your appearance, men will see them too. If you have crooked teeth or hairy legs, who gives a damn! Be yourself, and don't be afraid to show that crooked smile of yours or your beautiful hairy legs! NEVER be ashamed of yourself! Be confident when you meet new people. Interacting with new people can be scary, but if you're alert, ready for anything, and reserve judgment, people will want to get to know you. A man will be more attracted to a woman surrounded by friends than one who is looking sad and lonely. He'll want to be a part of your positive energy. Read more about how to feel good about yourself here. Continue to improve. It's one thing to be self-confident and another to be self-absorbed or blind to one's flaws. As you focus on your good qualities, work to improve that which can be improved. Consider all constructive criticism before dismissing it.
Develop your own identity and standard of values. A man is attracted to a woman who feels comfortable with where she came from, where she is now, and where she is going. He wants someone who is comfortable with her desires, her limitations, and her aspirations. Developing your own identity before you meet a man will ensure that you don't completely change who you are for him, or follow his lead all too often. Knowing who you are before you meet a man will also make it ten times easier to talk to him, and to attract him. Men want women who look like they'd be just fine without them. Just find yourself and really think about it! Compare me not! A lot of people fall into a cycle of comparing themselves to the people around them instead of their own standards. If you like your outfit when you leave the house, you should still like it when you get home. Don't let other people or your perceptions of other people influence how you feel about yourself.
Maintain meaningful and loving personal connections. The key to feeling good about yourself is to have a space to be yourself and be loved for that self. Friends, family, and other personal interactions are necessary for you to feel loved and deserving of love. Make sure your personal connections are beneficial to your emotional state. Toxic and detrimental relationships, past and present, can affect the way you feel about yourself and the way you carry yourself. Find friends who focus on your positive attributes, offer helpful advice, and are honest about who you are and who you can be. Have a warm relationship with your family members. Making time to speak to the people who have known you the longest can remind you of your roots, and of how much you've grown.
Be Your Best Self--Physically
Look the part. Now that you're feeling beautiful on the inside, it's time to show off your looks through the right clothes and makeup. You don't need to go on a shopping spree, but you should find the look that will help you snag a man. Find clothes that emphasize your best attributes. If you have toned arms, go for a tank top, or if you want to show off your long legs, find the perfect dress and heels for your body. Make yourself look a little fun but do not always focus on that; focus on in the inside too! Dress appropriately for the occasion. If you're hoping to attract a man at a wedding, for example, look classy--not trashy. You don't want a man to think that your body is your best feature--it's just one of the things that makes you unique. However, if you're out at a club, avoid business-casual attire, which will make you stick out like a sore thumb. If you are going to a party, than sure! Go show off those pretty legs of yours, or your nice arms, but don't get too skimpy and inappropriate; watch what you wear. Have the right hair and makeup. Light hair and makeup maintenance can go a long way in emphasizing your best features. Most men prefer a natural look, so avoid trying too hard by applying too many layers of makeup or hairspray. Well, if you ask me it would be best to not where make-up, and show your natural beauty, but if you would like to put on a bit, then be my guest! But too much can make you look like you're trying too hard.
Practice good hygiene. That new dress or new found self-confidence won't have much of an effect on the man of your dreams if you haven't showered in a week. It's important to stay clean and smell nice. I would wear some deodorant, or the slightest spritz of perfume! But not to much because some people react very poorly to it, and who knows what could happen? Shower at least every other day, and definitely on the day of a special occasion. It's important for your body to smell fresh. And you never know what could happen! Wash your hair as often as you need to. Some women wash their hair every day, while others take more time between washes. Find whatever works for you in order to keep your hair from looking greasy. Keep a clean mouth. Remember to brush your teeth and use mints or gum to keep your breath fresh when you need to. You can even test the smell of your breath by blowing into your hands. Nothing will turn off a man faster than a beautiful woman with dragon breath!
Give your body the royal treatment. Though a real man will love you for who you are, being health-conscious and working out will help you maintain a trim figure and will boost your confidence in the process. If you feel great about your body, any man you meet will feel the same. Exercise at least three times a week for at least thirty minutes, or more. A solid work-out regimen is essential to getting and staying healthy. Don't let your routine stagnant - keep challenging yourself as you get stronger and fitter. If you don't have a lot of time to set aside for exercise, consider ways in which you can add more walking to your daily routine. If you don't care for exercise for the sake of exercise or health, find an external motivation - for instance, take a local kickboxing or boxing class because you want to be able to defend yourself, or taking a yoga class because you want to make some new friends. Eat healthy. Moderation is a key in life, so take the time to splurge on your favorite ice cream or pizza, while also taking time to eat lots of fruits, vegetables, and food that is rich in nutrients. Avoid processed or greasy foods as much as you can. Your body will feel better, and your skin will look better.
Focus on Body Language
Make a good first impression. Now that you feel amazing both physically and emotionally, it's time to attract that special someone. Remember that you only get one first impression, so have a positive attitude before you meet the man in question.
Establish eye contact. The first thing you can do is establish eye contact to show a man you're interested. Hold his gaze for just the right amount of time. You don't have to stare into his eyes for hours, but looking at him for just a few seconds from across the room will show that you're interested. Be coy yet approachable. When you look at the man, try not to look too eager, but make it clear that you would be happy if he started a conversation with you. Let your facial expressions do the talking. Once the man approaches you, don't forget to smile, smile, smile! Nothing says that you're friendly and attractive like a good smile. Smile--but don't over think it. Make your smile something you approach the world with. Not only will this make your smile more natural and frequent, but you will feel happier in general. Try smiling when you're not happy - you'll find that some happiness bubbles up. You don't have to look overly-eager when you smile--just be natural.
Have positive body language at all times. Now that your man has seen the look in your eyes, as well as your pearly whites, it's time to use your body to show him the attraction is mutual. Carry yourself in a confident manner. Don't slouch, look at your feet, or cross your arms over your chest. Avoid nervous actions such as playing with your hair or biting your nails. Instead, face the man and keep your arms moving through gestures. This will make you seem like an open and dynamic person. Show him that you're interested. If you're feeling his love, there's no harm in leaning in to hear him talk, especially if you're in a loud or crowded place. A light touch on the arm or knee can also show him that you like what he has to offer without being too aggressive. Physically hold his attention. Make sure to maintain eye contact and to avoid looking around--or even worse, checking your phone every five minutes--when he's talking to you. He wants to feel like he's the only person in your world, and nothing will turn a man off faster than someone who checks her email every two minutes instead of holding up her end of the conversation. Touch him but not in the weird way but a friendly/flirty kinda touch like when he is right you agree and smile and touch his knee? But always find some way to get close!
Talk the Talk
Just say "yes". This doesn't mean you should agree with any strange idea your dream man may have, but it does mean you should have a positive attitude and be interested in what he has to say. If he asks if you've been to a certain restaurant, don't cut off the conversation by saying no; instead say that you've heard great things about it and ask questions about his experience. It's likely this is his way of asking you for a date! If he's teasing you, play along. Enjoy his playful personality. If you say "no" to any slightly offbeat idea he may have, you will look prudish, and not like someone he wants to hang out with. Don't be overly disagreeable right away--even if you disagree. If you find out that your favorite sports teams are arch rivals, or that you fall on opposite sides of the political spectrum, don't start a fight about it. Being playful about your differences is one thing, but getting on a soap box about your views will make you look stubborn and selfish.
Don't be afraid to be funny. Men love women who have a great sense of humor and who are confident enough to show it off. Though this may not be the time for knock-knock jokes, don't be afraid to throw in a joke or two if the occasion is appropriate. Show that you can laugh at yourself. No man wants a woman who takes herself too seriously--showing that you can laugh at your own foibles will show not only that you have confidence, but that you're aware of your flaws. Men don't want a girl who is "too perfect" and this will make them feel more secure about themselves.
Show off your sharp mind. Don't be afraid to show off your brains for fear of intimidating a man. If he's the right guy, he'll be attracted by how smart you are, and will want to spend more time picking your brain. Show him your knowledge of current events, historical figures, or even your witty analysis of pop culture. If you know what you're talking about, he'll be pleased to hear you pontificate about any subject. There's a difference between sounding smart and showing off. Avoid bragging about where you went to college, what you got on the SATs ten years ago, or any other information that may make it sound like you're floating your own boat.
Show what makes you unique. There are plenty of confident, funny, and smart women out there, but there is only one you. Don't be afraid to put yourself out there to show what makes you who you are. If it's appropriate, tell him a funny or interesting story from your past that will give him a sense of what kind of person you are and what kind of experiences have shaped your life. Don't be afraid to share your interests. If you're teaching yourself French or are learning to ride the unicycle, tell him about it. He'll be impressed that you're marching to the beat of your own drum and will be impressed by your zest for new things. Share something about your friends or family. While you want to avoid telling him that you can't wait to introduce him to Mom and Dad after you've just exchanged names, you can say a few things about who your family and friends are to show who has influenced you to be your best possible self.
If the conversation goes well, make plans to meet again. Part of attracting a man is keeping him interested. If the flame of love is glowing, you should add logs to the hearth! Though you can still play coy, make sure to exchange information before you leave if the attraction is mutual. You should avoid coming on too strong, but express an interest that will make the man see that you want to spend more time with him. You'd be surprised by how shy many men are, and how happy they are when women step up and take the initiative.
If your plan fails, don't despair. Unfortunately, certain men may not be attracted to you no matter how hard you try. But don't sweat it--there are plenty of men out there, and you've made yourself a better person already by following these tips! If the man you're seeking doesn't recognize your new confidence, looks, or conversational skills, then someone else will come along who will never want to leave your side. Though you may try to attract a man with all your might, his heart may be taken. Even if he's not in a serious relationship, he may have had a recent heartbreak or could be pining for someone else, and there's nothing you can do to change that. If you're rejected, play it off. There's no need for waterworks or angry text messaging if your crush doesn't reciprocate your feelings. Hang tough and the right guy will come along!
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