How to Be More Charismatic

• Charisma is the ability to attract, influence, and charm other people. Charismatic people are often likable, confident, passionate, and empathetic.
• Using engaged body language, making eye contact with people, and smiling more can help you come across as more charismatic.
• It’s also helpful to maintain a positive attitude, talk about your interests and passions, and share your sense of humor.

Make eye contact with people.

Eye contact draws people in and shows them you're interested in them. This is super important if you’re hoping to be more charismatic. As soon as you enter a room, make an effort to look people in the eye, and maintain eye contact while you're speaking with them.If you have trouble making eye contact, practice with someone you love and feel comfortable with. Then, slowly expand how long you make eye contact with people you don't know well.

Focus on smiling more when interacting with others.

A smile can make you seem more approachable and charismatic. Smiling lights up your face, and research suggests that it even makes you appear more attractive. A smile also gives you a warm, inviting air, which draws people toward you and puts them at ease. Just be careful not to smile too hard, as this can be off-putting. It’s important that your smile seems genuine and not forced!

Use open and engaged body language.

Try not to hunch over, face away from people, or cross your arms. This type of body language closes you off to others, which makes you seem less approachable and charismatic. Instead, keep your arms uncrossed, angle your body toward the people you’re talking to, and lean toward them when they’re speaking. This helps you appear more engaged and interested in connecting with them. Charismatic people are open, so closing off yourself will turn people off from you.

Talk with your hands.

Gesture with your hands while you speak to emphasize your points. This makes you seem more animated and passionate about what you’re talking about, which helps you capture people’s attention. This is a key aspect of being charismatic!

Share your unique interests and passions.

Charismatic people fascinate others with their enthusiasm. So, when you’re hanging out with people, don’t be afraid to share your amazing ideas and talk about the things you’re passionate about. Be excited about what you say and do, and invite others to share in your excitement!

Show off your great sense of humor.

Humor is a surefire way to win people over and hold their attention. Try cracking jokes, telling a hilarious story, or making a funny, self-deprecating comment. Just be careful not to go overboard. Pepper humor throughout your conversation, rather than trying to do a full stand-up routine.

Remember people's names, and use them in conversation.

This makes people feel special and important to you. When you meet someone new, repeat their name to help cement it into your memory. Then, use their name frequently throughout the conversation, and remember it the next time you see them. This shows that you have a genuine interest in knowing who they are.Repeating a person's name several times while you speak to them is the best way to cement it in your mind.

Compliment and praise the people around you.

Charismatic people build others up and make them feel special. When you’re offering a compliment to someone, be specific and genuine to make your comment more meaningful. Be careful not to overdo it, however, as this can come across as insincere. For example, you could say something like: “Congratulations on getting that new job! You’re such a dedicated and passionate person. They’re so lucky to have you.”

Bond over mutual interests.

Charisma is all about connecting with others. Talking about shared interests and experiences is a great way to do this! Maybe you enjoy the same type of music, or have the same favorite movie. Or, maybe you both love to ski or play basketball. If you’re able to find some common ground, a genuine connection will follow!

Practice active listening.

This means giving your undivided attention while someone’s talking. Active listening shows the other person that they’re important to you, and that you’re genuinely interested in what they have to say, which helps you come off as charismatic. Here are some examples of what to do: Nod your head and react with appropriate facial expressions while they’re talking to signal that you’re fully present and engaged. Paraphrase what they’ve said and repeat it back to them. For example, you could say, “That’s so crazy that you ran into your friend from high school! Did you have fun catching up?” Ask relevant, thoughtful questions to show that you’re interested. If they mention that they’re a photographer, for example, say, “That’s so cool! What kind of photos do you enjoy taking the most?” Avoid conversational narcissism. In other words, don’t hog the conversation, and make sure you’re taking equal turns while talking. Don’t look at your phone or aimlessly scroll while having a conversation—make sure your full attention is on the other person.Designate time to check your phone. For example, you might occasionally excuse yourself to the restroom, where you can check your phone.

Develop your empathy.

Charismatic people make others feel seen and understood. Empathy, or the ability to put yourself in another person’s shoes, is a key ingredient for this. To be more empathetic, think about where other people might be coming from, and try to see things from their perspective. Show people you care about how they feel by verbally acknowledging their emotions and listening to what they're going through.

Work on your self-confidence.

Charismatic people tend to be confident and self-assured. This doesn’t mean that you have to be the most outgoing or extroverted person around—it’s more about being true to who you are and comfortable in your own skin. Here are some tips to build your self-confidence: Practice positive self-talk. This means being kind and supportive toward yourself, the way you would be toward someone you love, instead of being overly self-critical. Make a list of all your positive qualities and accomplishments to build yourself up. This will help banish self-doubt. Don’t compare yourself to others, and don’t try to change yourself to “fit in.” You are uniquely you, and that’s beautiful!

Adopt a positive mindset.

Positive energy is infectious. It draws people in and makes them want to be around you, which is an important part of being charismatic. Here are some tips to help you cultivate a more optimistic outlook: Practice reframing negative thoughts. When you catch yourself thinking something negative like, “This is too hard. I might fail,” counter it with a positive statement, like “This is an opportunity to learn and grow.” Make a gratitude list or keep a gratitude journal. Appreciating the good things in your life helps you maintain a more positive mindset. Improve your mood with laughter. Laughter can help you feel less stressed and keep your mood up at difficult times. So watch a funny movie, tell a joke, or share a funny story! Surround yourself with positive people to help you maintain your optimism.

Allow yourself to be vulnerable.

Vulnerability makes you more relatable and down-to-earth. This puts others at ease and helps you build connections with them, which is an important aspect of charisma. This doesn’t mean telling people all about your deepest fears and insecurities. It just means that you’re willing to honestly express your emotions and embrace your imperfections. Don’t be afraid to poke fun at yourself, share an embarrassing memory, or be honest about a time you struggled. It takes courage to be vulnerable in this way, and people will respect you for it!