views
Lead in with something that will make her curious.
Make her feel like you can't wait to tell her something. Starting out a conversation with "Hey what's up" or "WYD?" is kind of boring—it makes it seem like you're sitting around with nothing better to do. Instead, start your text with something that will make her instantly want to know more, like "Guess what I just did," or "You won't believe what happened at work today." It's an instant hook, and she'll feel special that you picked her to share your interesting story. Don't worry about being overly creative – according to expert John Keegan, simplicity keeps it fun and takes the pressure off.
Ask her for a recommendation.
Let her know her opinion matters to you. It's really flattering when you ask someone to help you make a decision, especially if that decision plays up to their strengths. You're basically saying, "I know you're good at this, and I'd love your input." In fact, that's a good line, so feel free to lead with that! If you're texting a girl who's really stylish, you might send her a picture of a pair of pants and two shirts and ask her which shirt works best. If she's always up on the latest music, ask her to recommend a new album. If she's really great at dealing with people, reach out and ask for her advice when you're trying to navigate a tricky social situation.
Give her a compliment.
Point out something specific you like about her. A well-timed, sincere compliment can make anyone happy. It might be something you noticed about her the last time you saw her in person or something you saw in a picture of her, like her smile or her awesome outfit, for instance. But to really make a great impression, mention something about her character—it will show you understand her on a deeper level. For example, you might say, "I think it's amazing how no matter what you're going through, you always look on the bright side of things." Or you could say something like, "You have this way of making other people feel really special. That's a real gift!" Too many compliments can start to sound insincere, so don't go overboard with this. Just drop one in every so often when you feel like she could use an extra boost.
Tell her that something reminded you of her.
Bring up a fun or sweet memory you share. If you're out and about and you see something that makes you think of a girl you know, tell her about it! It might make her feel really happy to know that she's on your mind. Snap a pic and send it to her with a caption like, "Remember when we talked about this?" or "This made me think of that movie we saw." This is a great way to get back in touch if you haven't talked to her in a while—just pop in randomly to say she crossed your mind, then chat for a little while to catch up! If you're trying to cheer up a girl who's down, you could also remind her of a fun memory the two of you share. For instance, you might say, "Hey do you remember the time we tried to make donuts? We made such a huge mess but we laughed so hard!" Here's a great idea from expert Cher Gopman: don't be afraid to send a selfie or a photo of where you are to let her know you're not only thinking about her, but that you wish she was there with you.
Make her smile with something cute or funny.
Bring up her mood with your fun personality. Talk about movies, music, or TV; tell her funny stories; send memes that you think will make her laugh—anything that's not too serious. You can even tease her a little or lightly make fun of yourself as long as you don't come off as mean-spirited or self-pitying. If you're ever stuck for something to talk about, you can never go wrong with a gif or video of a cute animal doing something silly. It's best to avoid emotionally-charged subjects like politics, religion, race, or class struggles. That doesn't mean you can never talk about these things, but it might be best to talk about them in person, when you can pick up on each other's tone of voice and body language to make sure you don't accidentally cross a line.
Ask her questions about herself.
Give her a chance to open up. When you ask someone a question about themselves, you're telling them that you really care to get to know them better. Just avoid asking too many questions in a row—that can start to feel like an interrogation. Instead, ask a question, then follow up by chatting about it for a while. To learn more about her past, ask questions like, "What were some of your favorite childhood traditions?" or "What's your most favorite memory?" You can also ask questions about her job, hobbies, or pet to learn more about her current day-to-day. Find out about her dreams by saying something like, "Where would you go if you could travel anywhere?" or "What's your dream job?" Use your questions to figure out what you have in common, then follow up on that. For instance, if she mentions liking sushi, you might text her a few days later with a picture of a great roll you tried.
Let her know you're there for her.
Be a good listener and a supportive friend. Whether you're texting a casual acquaintance, a friend, or a girlfriend, there will be times that she just needs someone to talk to. It can be hard to show that you're really paying attention during a text conversation, so send occasional reactions like, "Wow," or "What happened next?" so she'll know you're interested. Try asking thoughtful questions to learn more about the situation to show you really care. Avoid giving her advice unless she asks for it. She might just be venting and may not want you to try to fix her problems for her. Flirting is fun, and it definitely has its place. If she's upset or being serious, though, it's probably the not right time for it.
Share some of your interests with her.
Give her a chance to get to know the real you. Share something you're really passionate about, and let her know why it's important to you. If she likes you, seeing you excited about something will probably bring a smile to her face, and she might just discover a new passion of her own! For instance, you might spend some time talking about an awesome new recipe you made, why you love windsurfing, or a musician you think is seriously underrated. Try turning this into an invitation to hang out. If you're talking about windsurfing, for instance, you might say, "I'd love to bring you with me next time I go. Are you in?" Just don't go overboard and talk about yourself the whole time. If she mentions something she likes, turn the conversation to her for a little while.
Make plans to hang out.
Dream up some fun things to do together. Texting is fun, but eventually, you're probably going to want to spend some time together face-to-face. Share a few ideas of things you'd like to do the next time you hang out. Just be sure to follow through with some of them once you meet up so she doesn't feel let down. For instance, you might say something like, "Hey, I saw a cool new coffee shop downtown. Let's go grab an iced mocha on Saturday, then maybe we can go shopping for a little while." The plans don't necessarily have to be concrete. You might say something like, "Next summer, I'd love to take you sailing. I think you'd love it!" Even if you've been friends or dating for a while, try to think up new and exciting things the two of you can do together.
Text her regularly but not non-stop.
Give her a chance to miss you once in a while. She might have her phone on her at all times, but that doesn't mean the two of you have to text 24/7. If she says she's doing something or if the conversation slows down, go find something else to do for a little while. It's fine to text her again the next time you have something interesting, but don't just hit her with a random "hey" because you're bored. There's no set time-table for how often to text—it really depends on how close you are. If you're dating or you're really good friends, you might text a few times a day. If you don't know each other that well, you might only chat every couple of days. At the same time, the old "3 Day Rule" is outdated. Expert Joshua Pompey says you don't have to wait three days after a date to follow up with a text. With our phones on us all day, every day, radio silence after a great date might just make you seem uninterested. Reader Poll: We asked 213 wikiHow readers what do they do when a girl doesn’t respond to a text, and 55% said they would wait patiently for her to reply. [Take Poll]
Comments
0 comment